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That Doesn't Look Like Snow
Written by Raffman on January 5 2005
FUBAR Ebaums World WTF People College Free Stuff EHOWA |
Fat kids crack me up. Remember the good ol' days back when you were in
fifth or sixth grade, and you'd wake up every once in a while in the winter to your mom
telling you that school was cancelled because of an overnight snowstorm? I'm sure you
do, in fact I think everyone can attest to that scenario since we've all been through it
at some point. Well, at least all of us who live far enough north that is. Anyway, those were the days. All you had
to do was turn on your alarm clock radio or stereo and listen while you laid
in bed, waiting to hear if your school district was called off on the list. Now that you're in college however, snow can eat my ass for all I
care. While we don't get much snow down in
Southern Illinois, we get our fair share of it. I remember my Freshman year waking
up to a huge snowstorm and being like, "There's no way classes are in session today,
they've got to be cancelled." Well, I found out the hard way two days later when
I was a day behind. The fact that I missed class isn't the bad thing, though. The shitty thing is the snow itself, and
the devastation and pure havoc it
creates around college
campuses in the midwest, not to mention everywhere else with snow.
Taking my town and campus for example, about 25,000 students call
Southern Illinois University home. The town is about the same size population-wise, and
the fact that it doesn't snow much there provides an interesting situation for the
campus. To make a long story a little bit shorter, the town only has 1 snow plow for
the roads. Yes, one snow plow. What's
worse is, I don't think anyone in their right mind has any clue how to operate it. When
we get a snowstorm at school, they
don't shovel the sidewalks, they don't cancel classes, and they don't fuckin care either.
Probably the funniest part about
all of this, and please be aware that I've turned the sarcasm way up, is that they don't
even salt the campus sidewalks. Over my three and a half year tenure as a faithful
Saluki I think I've wiped out and fallen on my ass around 30-40 times. I'm not exxagerating at all when
I say this, and what's scary is I have
damn good balance. You know how much it blows when you're inching to class, barely
lifting up your feet in fear of landing on your back, only to wipe out viciously anyways in front of 30 people? For most of
you reading this and in
college, I'm sure you know somewhat from where I'm coming from. For those of you
who have yet to experience college winters, you've been forewarned.
Be prepared not only to fall on your ass in front of dozens of people, but also to trudge
through 4 feet of snow only to find out that the class actually was cancelled because your professor is too fucking lazy. Oh boy let me tell
you, walking into a class after you did the splits two or three times on
your way only to find out that it's been cancelled may very well be one of the best
feelings in the world. Almost
as good as waking up on Christmas morning when you're six years old. Once again, I hope you're picking up my sarcasm
because I'm laying it on pretty
thick. You see, when God decides to drop a foot of snow on your campus overnight, the
shit hits the proverbial fan
because it's nearly impossible to find out if your class is cancelled or not. Unless
it's a downright blizzard, your
respective university won't close down so it's up to you to figure out if you've got
class or not. While I don't recommend
skipping class when it snows, I hear stealing trays from the cafeteria work
perfectly as sleds for sledding.
College Downtime is in a huge transition right now as I've got friggen gobs and gobs of delicious
content to upload for your hungry little minds. I'm currently revamping our Movie section with thumbnails and movie previews, not to mention
adding over 50 new movies to it! The Games section is currently
being overhauled as well as I'm adding close to 40 new flash games as we speak, so be
sure to check back in to see the new ones as they're uploaded. On top of that, I
finally have the long-awaited second Random Ass
Review coming within the next week. I'm in the process of taking pictures, and
getting everything ready. This one is gonna be good, and if you're a deep sleeper like
myself that has trouble waking up for class, you're gonna want to see this. Like I
said, it will be ready in no more than a week so be sure to check back in. More movie reviews, celebrity bios, and the long-
awaited book review section are all coming this next week as well, so get ready for tons
more content. Lastly, be sure to piss someone off in our forums,
as it's a fantastic way to
meet fellow college students. See you on Friday.
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