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Classic Nate...
Who is Nate Orenstam and what exactly makes him the world's funniest Java programmer? Find out by reading some of his best blend of technology and satire including the classic HP Merger FAQ included in the book Valley of the Geeks Subscribe to the free email newsletter so you'll be notified regularly of the best new items.
NEW: White Washed!
August 15, 2004
Phil White, former CEO of Informix, who was convicted of eight counts of security fraud for filing known false statements with the SEC, has now been sentenced to 2 months in federal prison, a $10,000 fine and dinner without desert. More...
Oracle Teams with Mafia
November 14, 2003
Oracle today announced a new strategic agreement with US organized crime syndicate the Zamboni family of New York. "In this tough economic climate, we wanted a partner that would do 'whatever it takes' to be successful," said CEO Larry "the mouth" Ellison. "Believe me, these guys will do that and more." More...
Iraqi Minister Flees
October 13, 2003
In the latest twist in the war in Iraq, the former Iraqi Information Minister Mohammed Saeed Al-Shtupp has fled Iraq and has taken a new position with software giant Microsoft. More...
Jayson Blair Witch Hunt
July 15, 2003
Former New York Times reporter Jayson Blair, has resigned amid a scandal of journalistic fraud at the newspaper. Mr. Blair resigned his post when it was discovered that he had plagiarized an interview with an alien from Planet X that had allegedly kidnapped New York Attorney General Eliot Spitzer. More...
Doctor Cellphone
June 1, 2003
Thirty years ago, Dr. Martin Cooper demonstrated the first portable cellular phone by calling a rival at Bell Labs. Dr. Cooper holds eight patents in the area of cellular communications and three in the area of small munitions. Dr. Cooper spoke to us from San Melvino Di Burpo, home of his latest company, AnnoyComm, about the history of cell phones and his rivalry with Bell Labs. More...
Miss Demeanor
July 28, 2002
Now that Ann Landers is no longer with us and Dear Abby has been taken over by a cigar chomping man in drag, it's hard to find good sound advice in business. So to meet this need, we present our new advice column for the high priests of high tech in need of a little high-minded wisdom with a feminine touch. More...
MS: Remedy To Cause Plagues
May 12, 2002
Microsoft executive Jim Allchin took an aggressive stance against the government proclaiming that any potential remedies against the company would ultimately cause ten years of plagues. More...
I2 CEO Greg Brady Resigns
April 21, 2002
Supply-chain management software company I2 ousted CEO Greg Brady after reporting a revenue decline of more than fifty percent and two disastrous made-for-TV movies. More...
Q&A with Steve Ballmer
April 13, 2002
I recently met with CEO Steve Ballmer at thermo-nuclear powered Dixie's BBQ in Bellevue to learn more about Microsoft's new organizational structure. Over a lunch of raw beef and skewered executives, we discussed Microsoft's inner workings, the departure of Rick Belluzzo and new security challenges. More...
MS PR Machine
April 1, 2002
Ever wonder how Microsoft is able to maintain such a constant stream of communications from headquarters without actually having an in-house PR staff? We've recently discovered that Microsoft has in fact "eaten its own dog food" and built a software program that completely automates the creation of new press releases. More...
Ballmer Leaves Microsoft
March 25, 2002
Microsoft today announced the resignation of CEO Steve Ballmer after just over two years in the top position. Ballmer will be be exiting the Microsoft executive suite to pursue a life-long dream of joining the rock group KISS. The announcement caused a flurry of activity on Wall Street this morning as investors unloaded Microsoft shares and bid up KISS paraphernalia on eBay. More...
HP Merger FAQ
March 17, 2002
Here is the unofficial FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions) regarding the HP / Compaq Merger. More...
Gartner Magick Quadrante
March 1, 2002
IT Consultancy GartnerGroup has announced a new, updated version of their "Magic Quadrant". The Gartner quadrant, debuted in 1620 when the Mayflower landed at Plymouth Rock and has been the hallmark of high-tech marketing ever since. More...
Dear Scott...
August 3, 1999
I wanted to let you know that I am very interested in taking over Alan Baratz's position at Sun Microsystems as the President of the Java Division, group or whatever. I am particularly interested in knowing who gets the remainder of Alan's stock options. More...
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