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Here is today's randomly selected R Joke of the Day!

Joke #4133
Rating:R

45 votes up
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to vote!

25 votes down


A man goes up to the minister at the local church. "Reverend,"
he said, "we have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during
your sermons. It's very embarrassing, not to mention
disrespectful. What should I do?"

"I've noticed this and have an idea if you're up to the task,"
said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be able to
tell when Mrs. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at
specific times. When I motion, you give her a good poke in the
leg."

In church the following Sunday, Mrs. Jones dozed off. Noticing
this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the
ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mr. Jones.

"Jesus!" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband jabbed her in the
leg with the sharp object.

"Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the minister's quick
reply.

Soon, Mrs. Jones nodded off again. And again, the minister
noticed. Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation,
motioning toward Mr. Jones.

"My God!" howled Mrs. Jones as she was stuck again with the pin.

"Right again!" bellowed the minister, a slight grin on his face.
Before long, Mrs. Jones again winked off. However, this time the
minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his
sermon, he made a few hand gestures that Mr. Jones mistook as
signals to bayonet his wife with the hatpin yet again. The
minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore
him his 99th son?"

As Mr. Jones enthusiastically poked his wife's thigh with the
hatpin piercing her skin she screamed, "You stick that freaking
thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it
up your ass!"

"Amen!" replied all the women in the congregation.




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