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77 jokes in the category Police


23 votes up
<- Vote! ->
27 votes down
Laff Factor:
PG:-4
A blonde gets pulled over by the police for speeding. "Ma'am you were going 75 miles an hour and the speed limit is 65." says the police officer.

"Oh I am sorry. I thought I was going a little over 60." says the blonde. "You were not! You were going 100 at least." says her husband.

"I have to give you a ticket bacause your tailight is broken." says the officer. "Oh I had never noticed that." says the blonde. "You've known about that for at laest 2 weeks." says the blonde's husband.

"I also have to give you a ticket because you are not wearing your seatbelt." says the officer. " Oh I thought I was." says the blonde. " You never wear your seatbelt." says the blonde's husband.

" SHUTTTTTUPPPPPP!!!!!!!" yelled the blonde to her husband.

" Sir. Does she always talk to you like this?" asks the officer.

" No. Only when she is drunk." says the husband

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funny jokes blond jokes adult jokes irish jokes gay jokes johnny jokes

22 votes up
<- Vote! ->
8 votes down
Laff Factor:
PG:14
A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall. He approached a uniformed policeman and said, "I've lost my grandpa!"

The cop asked, "What's he like?"

The little boy replied, "Jack Daniels and women with big breasts!"

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1 votes up
<- Vote! ->
5 votes down
Laff Factor:
PG:-4
A panda bear walks into a restaurant and orders a sandwich.
When he receives the sandwich he eats it and then shoots the
waiter and leaves the restaurant.
A policeman sees the panda and tells him he just broke the law.
The panda bear tells the policeman that he's innocent and, if
he didn't believe him, to look in the dictionary. The policeman
gets a dictionary and looks up "panda bear."
It says, ''Panda Bear: eats shoots and leaves.''

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funny jokes blond jokes adult jokes irish jokes gay jokes johnny jokes

7 votes up
<- Vote! ->
2 votes down
Laff Factor:
PG:5
Snappy Answer #4
A truck driver was driving along
on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads "low
bridge ahead." Before he knows it the bridge is right ahead of
him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for
miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his
car and walks around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his
hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I
was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

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funny jokes blond jokes adult jokes irish jokes gay jokes johnny jokes

0 votes up
<- Vote! ->
0 votes down
Laff Factor:
PG:0
A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over and the officer walked up to the car.

The Female police officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for the blonde's driver's license. The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman "What does a driver's license look like?"

Irritated, the blonde cop said "You dummy, it's got your picture on it!" The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and found a small rectangular mirror down at the bottom.

She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my driver's license" and handed it to the blonde policewoman.

The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go. And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have avoided all this hassle "

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funny jokes blond jokes adult jokes irish jokes gay jokes johnny jokes

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